Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Look at the most loving option...


The cusp that exists between the end of the old year and the beginning of the new year is a gentle twilight that draws us into its folds for quiet, deep reflection. It is usually the time we commit to making changes and improvements within ourselves so our lives may become more meaningful and worthwhile. It is easy to get caught in the daily busyness of work and routines that blur the days together into a fog of forgetting.It is at this point that a need for meditation enters. Meditation provides us with the opportunity to return to ourselves; to the spirit within us that is the source of our renewal and guidance. Each moment that we live is a grace. Let us spend this time to review the past year, and see all of the changes that have taken place within our lives; remarkable changes per se…


I was talking to a seminary friend few nights ago. The conversation lasted until dawn. It was a remarkable point in my life. It seemed that everything went back to zero. I felt like an empty vacuum. It was indeed an encounter with my god, He-Who-Is-Intimately-Involved... I must admit I am greatly troubled these past months. I was in a situation that seemed to be unbearable. But thanks to this seminary friend of mine, I feel like everything now is in order... He told me to look at the most loving option as the solution to my dilemma. I can’t help but post it here all that he said to me…

“Darius, do what moves you to love—love that is beyond your needs because it springs from your higher values. Sometimes, what complicates life is that we could not see clearly at which point our love is in the huge continuum of love. Love is practical; it is not based on impulse. It is based on the alignment of your heart, mind, and spirit. To discern means to see through what others think, what your culture dictates, and what you thought is the best political move you can make. This requires courage; and courage is more noble than winning. Be compassionate with yourself. Our minds are designed to get addicted, to get obsessed. It never works in a vacuum. But accepting this fact doesn’t mean you become a slave of your passions. Don’t ever make this fact—that the mind is designed to get addicted—as an excuse… ever. Your present moment requires you to go back to the center, which is self-knowledge, redefining the I. This requires courage, too, because you will face areas of you that you have ignored before. They are part of you but they do not define you. There is always the primacy of the whole. Once you emphasize only one part of you—either your wounds or your achievements—you are disintegrated because you don’t see yourself as a whole. Finding your true voice starts with holding yourself altogether. Compartmentalizing certain parts of you is an injustice. Everything connects. A pearl is not a pearl if not because of the dirt that gets into the mouth of its clam.
To trust God in any situation that you are into is genius; to trust only the situation is mere naiveté. You have to learn to listen. A Carmelite once wrote that to listen means to see things from the viewpoint of faith, to seek to discern and judge life—how it really is and where we are going. I admire your growing trust in God, no question about it, but you have to learn how to dance with Him. You have to learn his steps, his moves, and his pauses. And as I listen to your stories, He wants to dance with you towards your center. This requires letting go of living in the periphery, in the circumference. This requires discipline. This requires courage. Take one step at a time. It doesn’t matter if it’s slow as long as you aren’t stagnant. What is important is your sincerity and He’ll arrange everything else. “


He then added, “The decision to grow is with you. But don’t let your fears eat you. The real issue is not making a choice between a deemed necessity that will bear a long term pain versus a short term pain that will however make you loosen up. The issue is authenticity. And any authentic choice happens only when the mind, the heart, and the spirit are aligned—the authentic you. This is your birthright. This is also what God wants to happen. Less drama. Less feeling like a victim. More peace. More of being you and finding you.
piensa te...

Monday, January 1, 2007

untitled

You are intensely committed, to a vision, a goal, a dream. You are devoted to this vision because you know it will make the world a better place for yourself and everyone else. You believe that, regardless of the effort it takes, following through with this goal will ultimately make your life more fulfilling, more altruistic, loftier.
Then along comes life. And with it the ups and downs, the challenges and the obstacles.

You're not sure of the cause, but at some point, you find that you have swerved from your path. It might have been restlessness or boredom with the monotony of the day to day living. Or perhaps it was a spirit of impulsiveness, a rebellion against the swerves that life has thrown you.

What would you do then? What if you discovered mali ang path na tinatahak mo?

Common wisdom, laced with its jaded cynicism, says there's no turning back the clock. Move on with life, leave your childish idealism behind and face the reality of adulthood. Life is not a bed of roses; you need to look out for yourself and your needs. Forget your lofty ideals; a path of sacrifice is not where you will find fulfillment. And anyways, once you have already veered off the path, it can never be the same. It's simply too late.

True growth is not about only persevering on one straight path. Only after tasting of the bitter waters of life, only after struggling and stumbling and standing up against the darker forces of our world, do we become a greater, more courageous and enriched human being. Only after straying and then rebounding are we driven with a stronger yearning for inner unity and divine life. Only after experiencing the darkness of life's night and the desolation of its winters do we attain an even more intense and meaningful bond with God.

Thanks God, i was not hopeless, though I'm depressed... akala ko I'm getting nearer to the end of my rope. Buti na lang nandyan ka doc... pushing me to move on and face the realities of life, assuring me that everything will be alright...

Bitter waters of life taste good after all...

after a hard day's work

This afternoon I was on board for my 5-6pm radio program. Normally, my play list is made up of folk, rock, and country music and some local alternative hits. I had this very persistent caller who dialed the phone 10 times just to hear his favorite song. Feeling annoyed, I granted the request. Suddenly the lyrics of the song struck me. Napaisip ako ng todo. Bakit kaya may ganun?

"There's a fruitcake for everybody, there's a fruitcake for everyone. There are three sides of every story....." These are the lines of the song of the Eraserheads entitled "Fruitcake" which kept a lot of people asking; "why 3 sides?" Reality is matter of perspective. Most of the time people see reality from their own point of view and conclude that this reality is the TRUTH irregardless of how the other person would see it. However, the epistemological process is not just limited to the subject interpreting the object. It is the relationship of the subject and the object. And talking about the truth as conformity to knowledge, fact, actuality & logic, therefore personal interpretations does not cover the whole of the so called "truth". This will lead to the "third side" of the truth which possibly could neither be found in the subject nor the object. It could be that this truth is the product of the relationship or experience between the subject and the object. However, this reality which is the product of the said experience becomes a "mystery". It is not the poverty but the richness of the said experience. It is a reality which man cannot speak directly. To attempt to clarify this said experience is to draw on analogies afforded by the experience of the world.

In the movie Goodwill Hunting, the psychologist who was played by Robin Williams asked his student: "If I am going to ask you about Michelangelo, probably you are going to tell me about his personality, his works, the Sistine Chapel or even his sexual orientation. But can you tell me the smell of Sistine Chapel?" This dialogue in that movie is a typical comparison between understanding and perception as based from readings and from concrete experiences. There is a great difference between seeing things from afar just like reading them in the books or watching movies and the like than being there and getting involved. In the movies or in books, it is the author or the director's point of view which guides the spectator or the reader what to see or where to see. Not counting out the role of the Music Director who is there to add music to lead the feelings of the spectators. But real life is not like the said experience. Just like in the movie Walk in the Clouds, when the leading lady's father told her: "Tell me the truth!" she responded, "Who's side of truth, yours or mine?" The closer a subject gets to the object, the more engrossed and affected the subject becomes and in the process, the subjects identity could not be separated anymore from the object because they are involved with each other.
Ang dami ko nang sinabi... hehe ang gulo...

All i want to say is that let us just be reminded that still there are things in this world which doesn't change: sincerity, concern, compassion...... And there is this four-letter word which is most often neglected: LOOK!

honda civic ride

Aristotles' taxonomy begins with the premise that there are three main reasons why one person might like someone else. (The verb, “philein,” which is cognate to the noun “philia,” can sometimes be translated “like” or even “love”—though in other cases philia involves very little in the way of feeling.) One might like someone because he is good, or because he is useful, or because he is pleasant. And so there are three bases for friendships, depending on which of these qualities binds friends together. When two individuals recognize that the other person is someone of good character, and they spend time with each other, engaged in activities that exercise their virtues, then they form one kind of friendship. If they are equally virtuous, their friendship is perfect. If, however, there is a large gap in their moral development, then although their relationship may be based on the other person's good character, it will be imperfect precisely because of their inequality...

In kindergarten your idea of a good friend was the person who let you have the blue crayon when all that was left was the ugly black one.

In elementary school your idea of a good friend was the person who went to the restroom with you; held your hand as you walked through the scary halls; helped you stand up to the class bully; shared their snacks with you when you forgot yours; knew who you had a crush on and never understood why.
In high school your idea of a good friend was the person who let you copy their mathematics homework; went to that "cool" party with you so you wouldn't wind up being the only freshie there; convinced your parents that you shouldn't be grounded; consoled you when you broke up with your girlfriend; found you a date to the prom or went to the prom with you (both without dates hehehe); helped you pick a university and assured you that you would get into that university; helped you deal with your parents who were having a hard time letting you go.

On the threshold of adulthood your idea of a good friend was the person who was there when you just couldn't deal with your parents; assured you that you and your girlfriend were back together after some relationship problems; assured you could make it through anything and just silently hugged you as you looked through blurry eyes.

Now, my idea of a good friend is the person who gives you the better of the two choices, hold your hand when you're scared, helps you fight off those who try to take advantage of you, thinks of you at times when you are not there, reminds you of what you have forgotten, helps you put the past behind you but understands when you need to hold on to it a little longer, stays with you so that you have confidence, goes out of their way to make time for you, helps you clear up your mistakes, helps you deal with pressure from others, smiles for you when they are sad, helps you become a better person, and most importantly loves you!
Para sa'yo, thank you for being a friend.

No matter where we go or who we become, i will never forget you, who helped me organize myself, my work, and maximize my potentials to get there...

Maraming salamat sa honda civic ride...